“You’ll need to let go of that damn worry of yours about how they’ll receive what you have to offer.” That line alone is enough to change the way someone’s conception of themselves and how they engage with the world. I felt those words stick to my bones.
This essay found me at the exact right time. Thank you for writing, James.
Tommy - it feels like cheating to repost an essay from the past. I wrote that one in 2022 when I had about 25 subscribers. So I thought a few days ago, why not repost it? From what you wrote - it makes it all worth it :)
Some pieces fit perfectly as soon as we receive them. Others, I find, are my life’s work. That’s the way trust and candor feel to me. Like I need to work the edges, and sometimes even the middle of the piece, to have it fit in my puzzle.
Thanks for taking the time to comment. I’m grateful for you.
It's not cheating at all! It's an unfortunate part of writing online. All this beautiful work done over time gets forgotten in a week or two, unless you make an effort to point people back to it.
Thanks Tommy - a great perspective. I’ve often thought that the an interesting aspect of Substack is that there are great writers on it, yet anything “published” online has a half-life of about a week, which doesn’t do justice to the good stuff like a book would.
Hi Nancy, I miss you too. I hope you and the tribe of VG's are thriving and doing well! Katy and Tom are going to see mom this week. Will give you an update soon.
This is really beautiful - how you're highlighting how we can give and receive from others. Also, I can relate to being a people-pleaser and how hard it is to try to 'piss people off' which is translated as being more direct. Thanks for sharing this.
Serena - thank you for reading and taking the time to comment.
It's funny, some of the puzzle pieces we receive are "must have" pieces for us, but then we spend a lifetime shaping the edges so they'll fit. That's the way being direct and using candor is for me. It's not yet easy, even all these years later after the initial feedback.
Beautiful James. Thank you. Redux or revived for a new audience or a long-time audience with a new life perspective. A puzzle complete or still missing a piece or two or more.
I especially like the toddler story. I reminds that the small things done in great love can have an impact far beyond our intent. Sometimes it is the missing piece that someone needed. Thanks for the reminder,James.
Todd, I appreciate you taking the time to tell me. There were several stories I could use to illustrate the piece, and I wondered if that one was powerful enough. I used it because as you pointed out - it was powerful to me. An emotional and simple moment that carried great love - and continues to ripple forward to others. Thank you again.
I like the concept of puzzle pieces James. I’ve definitely had that feeling of suddenly realizing how the puzzle pieces fit together. Sometimes we feel angst because not everything’s figured out yet, but I guess that’s the beauty of being in-process. I’m glad you wrote about this!
Emily, your words, "the beauty of being in process" are so lovely. Isn't that the gist of it all? To be humble and to see that we're all "in process" and can contributed to and be contributed to by others, ongoingly.
Thank you for taking the time to comment. I'm grateful.
Great piece for Thanksgiving, James. And I love the equivalence of candor with “pissing people off”. That interpretation is the mark of a true gentleman.
Drake - leave it to you to pick up that particular distinction. 😊 that day my boss not only gave me those pieces with her words but she personified them by being straightforward while trusting that however I received them would be just fine, and just right.
The interesting thing about candor and trust, is that they are my life’s work - pieces I’m continually refining because they don’t yet feel natural.
Thanks again for taking the time to comment. It feels like cheating to republish an essay but I thought it might contribute to others and when I wrote it I had very few subscribers.
Thank you, James, for sharing this message as we celebrate today all that we are thankful for. I like the puzzle pieces analogy. As I reflect today on all the years and all the people who have passed through my life, I can see how they fit together (or not) like puzzle pieces. I think (and I hope) I have a lot more puzzle pieces to find.
Loys! So wonderful to hear from you. I hope you had a lovely day yesterday. I like what you wrote - we’re never done filling out our own puzzles and contributing our pieces to others. 🙏. I appreciate your contributions to me.
“You’ll need to let go of that damn worry of yours about how they’ll receive what you have to offer.” That line alone is enough to change the way someone’s conception of themselves and how they engage with the world. I felt those words stick to my bones.
This essay found me at the exact right time. Thank you for writing, James.
Tommy - it feels like cheating to repost an essay from the past. I wrote that one in 2022 when I had about 25 subscribers. So I thought a few days ago, why not repost it? From what you wrote - it makes it all worth it :)
Some pieces fit perfectly as soon as we receive them. Others, I find, are my life’s work. That’s the way trust and candor feel to me. Like I need to work the edges, and sometimes even the middle of the piece, to have it fit in my puzzle.
Thanks for taking the time to comment. I’m grateful for you.
It's not cheating at all! It's an unfortunate part of writing online. All this beautiful work done over time gets forgotten in a week or two, unless you make an effort to point people back to it.
Thanks Tommy - a great perspective. I’ve often thought that the an interesting aspect of Substack is that there are great writers on it, yet anything “published” online has a half-life of about a week, which doesn’t do justice to the good stuff like a book would.
I agree that upcycling such worthy content creates evergreen gifts to the rest of us.
I love the concept of being puzzle pieces for each other.
Upcycling. Thank you for that Karena. I hope you are doing well!!
Love your writings, Jamie. Your folks would be so proud. Miss you.
“Aunt” Nancy
Hi Nancy, I miss you too. I hope you and the tribe of VG's are thriving and doing well! Katy and Tom are going to see mom this week. Will give you an update soon.
This is really beautiful - how you're highlighting how we can give and receive from others. Also, I can relate to being a people-pleaser and how hard it is to try to 'piss people off' which is translated as being more direct. Thanks for sharing this.
Serena - thank you for reading and taking the time to comment.
It's funny, some of the puzzle pieces we receive are "must have" pieces for us, but then we spend a lifetime shaping the edges so they'll fit. That's the way being direct and using candor is for me. It's not yet easy, even all these years later after the initial feedback.
Thank you again. :)
Love that - we spend a lifetime shaping the edges so they’ll fit…
Beautiful James. Thank you. Redux or revived for a new audience or a long-time audience with a new life perspective. A puzzle complete or still missing a piece or two or more.
A long time audience with a new live perspective. I like that DW. I love you man, and I'm grateful for you.
Great message. My puzzle 🧩 is a little more complete. Thank you for sharing.
Thank you Kyla! I’m glad it contributed to you and that you took time to tell me. 🙏
I especially like the toddler story. I reminds that the small things done in great love can have an impact far beyond our intent. Sometimes it is the missing piece that someone needed. Thanks for the reminder,James.
Todd, I appreciate you taking the time to tell me. There were several stories I could use to illustrate the piece, and I wondered if that one was powerful enough. I used it because as you pointed out - it was powerful to me. An emotional and simple moment that carried great love - and continues to ripple forward to others. Thank you again.
I like the concept of puzzle pieces James. I’ve definitely had that feeling of suddenly realizing how the puzzle pieces fit together. Sometimes we feel angst because not everything’s figured out yet, but I guess that’s the beauty of being in-process. I’m glad you wrote about this!
Emily, your words, "the beauty of being in process" are so lovely. Isn't that the gist of it all? To be humble and to see that we're all "in process" and can contributed to and be contributed to by others, ongoingly.
Thank you for taking the time to comment. I'm grateful.
Great piece for Thanksgiving, James. And I love the equivalence of candor with “pissing people off”. That interpretation is the mark of a true gentleman.
Drake - leave it to you to pick up that particular distinction. 😊 that day my boss not only gave me those pieces with her words but she personified them by being straightforward while trusting that however I received them would be just fine, and just right.
The interesting thing about candor and trust, is that they are my life’s work - pieces I’m continually refining because they don’t yet feel natural.
Thanks again for taking the time to comment. It feels like cheating to republish an essay but I thought it might contribute to others and when I wrote it I had very few subscribers.
Thank you, James, for sharing this message as we celebrate today all that we are thankful for. I like the puzzle pieces analogy. As I reflect today on all the years and all the people who have passed through my life, I can see how they fit together (or not) like puzzle pieces. I think (and I hope) I have a lot more puzzle pieces to find.
Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours!
Loys! So wonderful to hear from you. I hope you had a lovely day yesterday. I like what you wrote - we’re never done filling out our own puzzles and contributing our pieces to others. 🙏. I appreciate your contributions to me.